Being in a relationship is not an easy task, it comes with a lot of sacrifices and commitment. However, there are some mistakes you need to avoid in your relationship so as not to encounter a ship wreck.
I’ll be giving you some mistakes you need to avoid in your relationship.
1. Saying “Nothing Is Wrong”
Some issues can seem so obvious that you can’t imagine your partner not realizing they did something wrong. So rather than discussing the problem, you stay silent and sulk about how they don’t seem to care that you are upset. When asked, “What’s wrong?” it’s so much easier and less painful to say “nothing.” It’s a momentary Band-Aid, but the problem remains. You either stay angry and resentful, or you move on and sweep the unresolved issue under the rug, which only gives it the opportunity to arise days, weeks, or months later with even greater ugliness.
2. Walking Away
This should not be confused with giving each other space. Taking a breather to calm down or clear your head during an argument is a good thing. But cutting the conversation off because you’re done is unfair play.
3. Reacting On Emotion
This is the hardest one for me. I’m an emotional person who likes to openly express my feelings, positive or negative, as soon as I feel them.
4. Comparing Your Partner to An Ex
The human mind naturally looks for patterns. When we experience a situation that’s even remotely similar to something from our past, we draw conclusions based on that past experience. This is how we improve our lives and learn, after all. But when it comes to relationships, this logic can be detrimental. For example, let’s say your ex took a long time to return your calls when he/she was losing interest in the relationship. Lately, your current partner hasn’t returned your calls quickly.
Conclusion: Your current partner is no longer interested in you. Wrong! Fight your brain’s addiction to patterns and remember that every single person and situation is unique. This is not to say you shouldn’t learn from your past or set standards for yourself. Rather, keep an open mind and afford each person a clean slate.
5. Holding Back
Give generously to your partner without expecting your kindness to be returned. Don’t be afraid of loving too much. Women, especially, often fear that showing too much interest makes them seem needy or clingy. If you want to be cautious at the start of a relationship, that’s completely understandable. But once you’re both in it for the long haul, give as much as you can.
If your significant other shows affection less openly and often, resist the urge to match their ways. Instead, communicate with your partner about how you need to receive love. Expressing love and showing kindness will never serve you wrong.
6. Threatening To Break Up
This is a dangerous mistake that places a dark cloud over relationships long after a heated argument has passed. The most fundamental part of a mature relationship is remaining committed in the lowest of times. By threatening to break up, even if you’re saying it out of frustration and don’t really mean it, you’re abandoning your partner in a cruel and cowardly way.
You’re basically saying, “I’ll love you until” or “I’ll love you only if.” Threatening to break up is a selfish power play that benefits neither person. Avoid playing that card at all costs. When emotions have cooled, you’ll be so glad you did.
7. Assuming Your Partner Will Change
Let’s get right to the point: Your partner is not going to change. A lot of people confuse the concept of compromise with that of change. Compromise involves two people meeting in the middle when it comes to their differences, which is necessary. Change involves one person asking the other to be someone they’re not, which is impossible.
You cannot change the essence of who someone is. This is not to say you have to love every little annoying thing about your partner (that is also impossible), but you must accept the fact that who you are with now is who you will be with forever, flaws and all.
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