14 common f*ckboy excuses and what they actually mean

Guys like to take advantage of the emotional and romantic nature of Ladies. Well, that’s stopping now. After reading this post, you’ll be enlightened on the lies guys tell to cover up what they actually mean.

Let’s get to it then!

1. Excuse: “I’m not ready to be someone’s boyfriend right now.”
What It Really Means: “I don’t want to be YOUR boyfriend EVER.”

2. Excuse: “I’m just having a chill night in, I’m so exhausted.”
What It Really Means: “I’m going out to party and will be hitting on a ton of girls. And I’m blocking you on Snapchat so you don’t find out.”

3. Excuse: “I’m SO busy with work this week, I’m sorry but I won’t be able to meet up for a while.”
What It Really Means: “I’m just stringing you along and keeping you on the backburner until I find something better, so I’m telling you I’m busy when I’m actually meeting up with other girls.”

4. Excuse: “I don’t even remember dropping a comment on that girl’s picture on Instagram, it must’ve been a mistake. She’s not even cute.”
What It Really Means: “Of course I remember commenting on her picture, she looked hot as fuck. And I messaged her right after.”

5. Excuse: “I just can’t use condoms, I can’t finish in them.”
What It Really Means: “I’m selfish and I don’t want to use a condom because it doesn’t feel as good as raw-digging it. I don’t care about your safety, and also, I’m putting you at risk because I haven’t been tested in over a year.”

6. Excuse: “It’s totally safe. I’ll pull out. And I was just tested last week.”
What It Really Means: “I’ll pull out because I don’t want a kid, but if I happen to cum inside you, I’ll just get you Plan B and not care that you’re going to worry for the rest of the month. I can’t remember the last time I was tested, and you aren’t the only girl I do this with, so you’ll probably get a disease.”

7. Excuse: “It’s so much easier to find your g-spot when you’re smooth and hairless down there.”
What It Really Means: “I’m grossed out by your stubble and expect you to be as bare as a baby’s bottom even though I will not groom my area at all.”

8. Excuse: “I know we have good conversations, but I just feel like we don’t have any chemistry. I’m sorry.”
What It Really Means: “Now that I know you aren’t easy, I’m going to end things and move onto the next because I’m a horny bastard who only wants sex.”

9. Excuse: “I just feel like we don’t click anymore. I really like you, but I think it’s best we stop talking.”
What It Really Means: “I found someone who’s better in bed and I never liked you at all.”

10. Excuse: “Let’s just have a romantic night in. We can cook, drink wine, cuddle and relax in each other’s arms. We can’t really bond at a bar or around other people.”
What It Really Means: “I have no intention of doing any of those things, I just want to get in your pants and I can’t do that in public. Also, I don’t want to be seen out with you because people will think we’re dating.”

11. Excuse: “69? Why don’t we just take turns? There’s no rush!”
What It Really Means: “I’m going to have you go down on me then pretend it was the best head of my life and say I’m too blown away to reciprocate because I don’t want to go down on you.”

12. Excuse: “I’m not hungry, let’s just get drinks.”
What It Really Means: “Food will make it harder for alcohol to kick in. I want you to only drink so you get tipsy enough to hook up with me, but not so drunk that it’d be considered me taking advantage of you.”

13. Excuse: “You think I’m using you? I’m insulted, I really care about you.”
What It Really Means: “I am completely using you but I don’t want to lose you because you’re willing to do dirty things in bed.”

14. Excuse: “I’m totally not a fuckboy, I just occasionally have a little fun.”
What It Really Means: “I am the definition of a fuckboy and am not changing my ways anytime soon.”

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